Permanent Damage
by Jack of Chocolate
Summary: After a terrible accident, Ed lost his memories for good.


Permanent Damage

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A/N: I have things to tell. I apologize for not being online for awhile, but that's because my computer was away on surgery. But the surgery was too expensive so I had to get a new one. Don't worry, I was bored as hell so I was writing the whole time. THREE FANFICTIONS TOTAL! They're all oneshots, so go ahead, drown in it. I hope you enjoy this one.

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Was this really the end? Could it be that all they've gone through was just gone like that? Al frowned inwardly at the thought. If someone could see these tears they'd know exactly how he felt.

_Miserable._

_Broken._

_Maybe even lost._

It was all an accident. The most terrible one he's ever witnessed. Al could even say that this incident was worse than the time they had tried to bring their mother back from the grave. His brother Edward Elric had lost his memories permanently.

All of it was gone. The memories of alchemy altogether along with the memories of his family, the military, enemies, and friends were all gone. He didn't even look the same anymore. Ed's bright golden eyes had turned dull; almost like a shade of gray. His grin used to be filled with such confidence. But now, all he could manage was a weak smile.

Nothing would be the same anymore. Not ever again. His personality had vanished, replaced with something foreign; something no one will ever get used to. He never threw a tantrum about anybody calling him short. Instead, he would just agree saying that he _was_ pretty short for his age. Any person who knew him even in the slightest way would notice the lack of spirit in him.

"Alphonse?" Ed asked with slight awkwardness. "That's your name, right?" Al turned his head toward his brother. He sighed momentarily and then replied, "Yes." He paused for a second, and then continued, "But you should call me Al." Ed smiled that same depressing smile.

Ed had just been released from the hospital a few days ago. He had to rest from any military work and his position as a state alchemist would probably be taken away. And now he sat in the library, not really reading but just sitting there with those dull eyes. Al looked at his brother again and then thought of something positive. He failed, unfortunately. Then he thought of something, although not exactly positive.

"Come on, Ed," Al said with a tinge of fake happiness in his voice, "Let's go tell everyone that you're fine." Edward blinked and stared with almost no interest. Nonetheless, he nodded and smiled a little more cheerfully.

They trudged down the corridor with bad news to tell the Colonel. Al guided him and knocked on the door. A short answer could be heard. Then the two walked in and saw a man dressed in the traditional blue uniform with black hair and dark eyes. He sat behind the desk and was looking out the window with little attention. Obviously, it was Mustang. He glanced at them over the pile of unfinished paperwork.

"Hello, FullMetal," he said with slight smugness, "Do you need another automail limb?" He expected him to yell in his face causing Al to hold him back so that he doesn't kill the Colonel. Instead, whether it was a good thing or not, Edward didn't yell or strike back with a rude remark. In fact, Mustang received a very quiet answer.

"Well," Ed started forcing another grin, "I suppose not." Roy frowned dangerously and was about to attack the former alchemist. "Wait, Colonel!" Al yelled in desperation to calm him down, although not fast enough. Roy had already grabbed Ed by the collar and thrust him into the air. It was tense in the room, while Ed and Roy stared for some time. The poor boy blinked in puzzlement, not making even an ounce of effort to struggle free. "What have you done to FullMetal?" he inquired strictly. After some time, he received an answer. It contained only three words. "I don't know," Ed whispered.

Al finally broke up the rather harsh meeting, and stopped him from hurting his brother any further. But after a few minutes, everything was thoroughly explained to the rather skeptical Colonel. He had FullMetal's eyes, body, and voice. But it was not him. He was almost too sure of that. Ed glanced at Roy but pried his eyes off of him. That man was intimidating.

The boy didn't mean to upset anyone, but he couldn't help it. All these people he supposedly knew; he didn't remember any of them. He felt like crying; yes, shedding those terrible tears would surely make him feel better. But, Ed couldn't do that. He almost tried to but nothing. He tried to cry out, but there was no voice. He couldn't even open his mouth.

The Colonel looked the boy before him. By then, Ed was also facing him as well. Their eyes met speaking no words. After the awkward minutes passed, Al led him of the room. "Let's go tell the others," he said gloomily thinking maybe it wasn't such a good idea to do this, "That you're fine.

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"Where could he have possibly gone to?" Al murmured to himself while running around in the somewhat familiar streets. He asked random people if they had seen his brother. Every one he asked had said the same answers; therefore he was on his own. Ed had run during the time when he met the other military members. Now here he was searching for him. Al quickly looked around each corner along with every alley there was. When he was on the verge of giving up on the search, he saw him.

Edward was in the alley where poor Nina and her dog had met their fate. He sat against the dead end's wall; his right knee tucked against his chest, while his other leg was sprawled on the cold ground. Al then sat with him and then asked, "Why did you run away?" In the first few moments, it definitely seemed as though he wasn't going to answer. But Ed took him by surprise.

"They don't want me there," he said his lips moving while the rest of his body was frozen. His voice was overflowing with such sorrow; it was a wonder he wasn't crying yet. Then Al immediately replied, "I'm sure they want you, it's just—"

"Just what, Al? They don't want me there. They want the old Ed, it's someone I could never be," Ed repeated himself, his staring directed at the younger brother.

Al opened his mouth to protest, but he knew it was true. Ed was still looking at him with the same dull eyes. Seconds passed and the tense atmosphere was still apparent. He then broke away from the stare, and looked down at the ground.

Ed's eyes were shadowed away; bangs also covering his eyes from view. Then he dragged his other leg close to him, wrapping his arms around the legs. Alphonse couldn't say any more. Again, Ed started speaking; only this time his voice was barely a whisper.

"Who _was_ I, Al?" he asked quietly while his eyes were brimming with tears. The boy in question had a sharp intake of breath with the sudden inquiry. He thought about it, thinking about the way to word his answer properly. Minutes passed as this progressed, hearing nothing but cars carelessly driving by.

"You were Edward Elric, the FullMetal Alchemist," said Al confident of his chosen response, "And I can tell you his story."

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A/N: Review!


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